Did you know that there are trophies like the one pictured above in hospitals all across the United States just waiting to be handed to mothers who deliver WITHOUT an epidural (or any pain medication)?
Not really. I kid.
But it feels like there should be when I observe the behavior of some moms in my "mommy forums" across the Internet. Terms and phrases like, "I caved," "unfortunately," "so sad," "weak," and "shamefully" used in conjunction with getting an epidural during labor and delivery make me angry.
Why is getting an epidural so taboo? Does it make a woman stronger or better because she didn't get one?
It sounds so petty, but the conversation is real. But who cares? Bringing a life into the world is a beautiful miracle, no matter how it's done or what assistance you get while doing so.
There are so many women who are so disappointed in themselves when they get an epidural and didn't plan to get one. I can understand being disappointed because that wasn't your original birth plan, but being disappointed because you feel that getting an epidural made you feel you were a weak woman is insane.
Every woman has a different pain tolerance level. We should be proud that we went through nine months of sharing our body with a tiny human despite all of the changes they put us through (emotional roller coasters, heartburn, swollen feet, rib punches, I'm sure you can add more here).
My point is simple: A woman is no weaker than the next because she gets pain relief during labor. So let's get off of our high horses and stop putting people down because their delivery process was different than ours.
I say that a huge "CONGRATS" is in order whether pain meds were received or not! What say you?
I'm glad that you wrote about this Mylah. I hear so many stories of getting or not getting an epidural. Idk what I'm going to do, but I'm thinking about my options.
ReplyDeleteThat's good Brandy! Keep your options open. You may or may not want/need one. Some studies have shown though that the more relaxed you are during labor, the faster your dilation. Just remember that whether or not you have one doesn't make you any less of a champion! So glad you read my post and commented! Muah!
DeleteThis is so true. And I'm not sure if it is more externally or internally driven. When I was pregnant with Ezra I had a birth plan that was as natural as I figured I could be. I never intended to use medication because I wanted to be able to make really clear decisions. After losing my first pregnancy that was really important to me. Then when the time came I ended up on so many pain meds, and I had to have a C-section to deliver. I admit I felt ashamed of myself for quite a while. But I eventually forgave myself for what I assumed to be a failure, and realized that I did all that I had to do to get my baby here safely.
ReplyDeleteBrandyne, I'm so glad you have forgiven yourself. That is so very important. You indeed did everything you could to get Ezra here safely...and God surely blessed you! He's such a wonderful boy.
DeleteLove this!
ReplyDeleteVery real + a topic that's rarely discussed from your perspective.
I had an epidural when I gave birth to my daughter...and I'd do it again for the next one.
Thanks for this.
Thanks so much for reading Paulatanesha! So glad to know that having an epidural was not a shameful thing for you. :-)
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